Don Ye Now Your Tinfoil Hats!

I'll admit, I said that other causes for runaway Toyota's needed to be looked at other then sticky accelerator pedals or floor mats. What I didn't think would happen would be someone taking it to the extreme and attempting to push one of the most out there theories I've heard for having car problems. The Detroit Free Press, a fine, local newspaper, reported this morning that cosmic rays could be turning Toyota's into high speed death traps.

Break out the tinfoil hats people!

Apparently some unnamed "concerned scientist" e-mailed the NHTSA to give them this important bit of information and provide them with links to Google searches for relevant documents. What's worse is that according to the Free Press article people are actually looking into this as a possibility, and I'm afraid you'll probably see the US Government get involved with it too. Sung Chung, the president of Eigenix (which sounds like some evil corporation that tries to take over the world), has been trying to push that comic rays (FROM SPACE!) could be a real issue because Toyota might not have designed their electronics to cope with it. Not surprisingly Eigenix is a company that specialises in single event upset prevention (electronic sneezes).

Chung was quoted in the Free Press article, "Nobody wants to come out and say we have issues and we need to test." What Chung was actually saying is that his company fully supports the needs of several multi-million dollar contracts from Toyota and the US Government to figure out if some completely off the wall theory holds any merit.

Of course Toyota is denying this saying their electronics are built to the highest possible standards, which is probably true. However, I highly doubt they've tested against SEU's because it would be a monumental waste of time, money and resources. Apparently these SEU's can happen at sea level, they just aren't common. They do happen with high altitude fight and space travel though. I know a lot of Prius owners think their cars are sort of automotive gods, but they cannot fly. Trust me I've driven a Prius, they couldn't even achieve the speed to lift off even if they wanted too.

Another thing people are failing to realise is that no other car has been struck down by these excited rays of energy from space. I am just speculating here but I do not think Toyota electronic components are some how a trade secret. With enough time, wire, resistors, a breadboard, and trips to the ER for lacerations or electrocution I could probably cobble something together to make a Camry run.

I am curious though what they expect us to do with all of this though, short of wearing a tinfoil hat while driving I can't think of anything else that would prevent this. Sure we could use NASA components, but this is an administration that spends $700 on a toilet seat, just imagine the cost of a piece of cosmic ray shielding. Although come to think of it, it would be awesome to take my car to the dealership so they could install cosmic ray shielding...and maybe an energy core with warp drive while they were at it! Every time I backed out of the garage I could have my own little private Captain Kirk moments telling my car to "raise the shields".

Any way I still think we need to address the fact that people can't drive as one of the concerns. If the government has the money to look into issues caused by cosmic rays then I would assume they have a ton of it just sitting around, so I would assume they could pay some eggheads to look into more believable theories.

Now if you'll excuse me I need to make a tinfoil hat so I can safely drive home.

Akio Toyoda's Pet Elephant

I know, it's another post about Toyota but this whole unintended acceleration incident is just too good to be true when writing opinion columns. It's chalked full of great information in which to make fun of the general car buying public with. Granted this needs to all be taken with a grain of salt as I'm mostly being tongue-in-cheek about the whole thing.

Our friends at Jalopnik have complied this handy dandy chart to exemplify one thing, see if you can spot the pattern.

This is just more fuel to add to the fire of speculation and conspiracy surrounding the whole Toyota debacle. Are the cars to blame or are pensioners? Is it just that younger people know how to handle issues that come up on the road better then older people? There is too much insufficient data to draw any hard conclusions like that but this is one piece of the giant puzzle that the NHTSA and Toyota need to address. I said it in a previous column that no company wants to blame their customers for something, that's horrible marketing and a good way to lose favour. This is seriously looking like something that needs to be considered at least, especially when you have 60 year old swingers who enjoy Bill Cosby sweaters faking a run away green machine. The quicker an answer is formed, the quicker people looking to make a fast buck will have to look elsewhere.

It seriously seems that everyone is ignoring the elephant in the room and all it's going to do is hang there like a giant albatross...two metaphors! Zing!

Hopefully someone that matters, not a small time blogger like myself, suggests this as a real possibility and we start looking at the data. Although I'm not sure how positive that would be for Toyota's image either. Sure their accelerator pedals don't stick and their cars won't be death traps, but then we'd all get the impression only idiots buy Toyota's. Whatever comes of this situation it appears Toyota's global presence is probably going to be fairly tarnished and the mighty will fall.

I'll say this here and now, I still think Toyota makes a good product. Every Toyota I've ever driven has drove well and I never ended up in some unexpected ride fearing for my life...but then again, those Toyota's are severely ageist and clearly hate old people and I'm just some 22 year old punk kid with too much time on his hands.

Problem Exist Between Seat and Wheel

John McElroy is one columnist that I really enjoy reading because the man is willing to say what others are afraid too. His opinion and mine often line up and see eye to eye, which is probably why I respect him so much. In McElroy's latest editorial he brings up a point that so many people have been dodging ever since Toyota's started to run amok all over the world: Could it be driver error?

No company in the world is going to say the customers are the root cause of the problem because that is just bad business practice. Working in IT we have a word for this though PEBCAK (Problem exist Between Chair and Keyboard), this means that the meaty, fleshy thing with it's backside on a chair and it's digits on the input device is typically the cause of most problems (read: human).

McElroy brings up some good points throughout his editorial, mainly that elderly people tend to buy Toyota's. I'd also like to throw out there that many foreigners purchase Toyota's as well, mainly from cultures not really known for their driving prowess. This is not to be racist or ageist, it's to actually think about other causes for the problem plaguing one of the biggest automakers in the world.

Audi went through a similar issue with unintended acceleration in the 1980's. It ended up being an issue of "pedal misapplication" according to the NHTSA, which in a nut shell meant the pedals were too close together. Now I haven't been driving for terribly long, just shy of 7 years, but I still know what pedal my foot is on. Even if the car does have pedals that are close together I can figure it out and you want to know why? I'm not an idiot, I actually pay attention when I drive a car.

And here is where we get to the root of the problem, people don't pay attention when they drive any more. We are a nation that feels the need to do every except pilot the three ton SUV you felt the need to purchase. I can't tell you how many people I see on a daily bases texting, shaving, reading, putting on make-up and whatever else you can think of while driving. It's little wonder why issues have been arising.

You might be thinking, but it's just Toyota's that have been having unintended acceleration issues. Well that's not entirely accurate, and thanks to circus inducing media it's what most people think. The Truth About Cars complied NHTSA unintended acceleration data from 2005-2010MY cars across all cars sold in America.

Now that is the list of the Top 20 cars with reported unintended acceleration problems and yes Toyota has 8 models on there, but so does Ford Motor Company. So should we be going after FoMoCo as well? I guess you'll have to just decide that for yourself.

Next time you here some news anchor, politician, or a man who wears Bill Cosby sweater and participates in naughty adult activity start off on some anti-Toyota tirade, just remember Occam's Razor where the simplest explanation tends to be the best. I mean what's more realistic? A hugely complex computer error that cannot be recreated by Toyota or other private investigation firm or that people do everything but drive. I know which one I think is more realistic and I think I'll dub it PEBSAW.

Prius Man, The New Balloon Boy

The internet is awash with stories that are coming in all over the place about Mr. James Sikes, of runaway Pruis fame, from Monday's unintended acceleration incident near San Diego, California. Our good friends over at the awesome automotive blogs Jalopnik and The Truth About Cars have been unfolding the story bit by bit as information comes in.

From what Jalopnik has uncovered Sikes was in some serious financial trouble, saddled with $700,000 in debt and had filed for bankruptcy in 2008. Sikes also has a history of things being stolen from him at rather opportune times, like his entire kitchen when his house was being foreclosed on. There are at least three reported incidents of theft against Sikes and probably more to come out of the woodwork as the day and weekend wears on.

To top all of this off though as sort of a Pièce de résistance Sikes and his wife are the proud owners of an adult website for swingers. I'm not talking about the Austin Powers Grrrrrrrr Baby, It's the Swinging 60's here either. This is seriously the stuff excellent sitcoms are based on, I mean really how could you not want to watch a show about a couple of bankrupt swingers who run a shady website, commit insurance fraud and attempt to fake a runaway Toyota? The man even rocks a Bill Cosby-esque sweater.

The evidence that is surfacing certainly pointing to Sikes doing this for the money, the fame, the whatever it is these people get out of creating an elaborated media circus around them. At least Richard Heene, Balloon Boy's attention whore father, was at least creative in his hoax and made it somewhat believable (well until the kid spilled the beans). Sikes wasn't even creative with his hoax, he rode the brakes worse then an old lady on her way to bingo and just kept the accelerator pinned until he felt as if he'd sufficient done grandstanding and just stopped. I guess Sikes didn't realise what a bunch of bored office employees that scour the internet could dig up on him.

I got slightly bored and figured I throw some more fuel into the fire as well. After looking up some Prius geeks, I uncovered the top speed of the generation of Prius Sikes owned was 106mph. So if the accelerator was stuck why would the car only hit 94mph? Cars don't magically stop accelerating 12mph short of their top speed...unless someone is holding the car are a given speed.

I know Sikes has come out and said he's not going to sue Toyota over this, but really he isn't fooling anyone, he's fully expecting some kind of "Shut-up" money from Toyota. I somehow don't think this is going to come, especially based on Toyota's latest investigation of the Prius in question which has left them "mystified". Cue the X-files theme.

So is Sikes full of it? Probably. Was this all a hoaxes? More than likely. Is this the last of the run away Toyota incidents that will populate the media? Not a chance, this is only the beginning.

Mr. Aiko Toyoda's Wild Ride

So it's not secret that Toyota's all over the global are running amok and killing people. Many more people are being taking on thrilling, death defying rides down highways in their Toyota or Lexus. All one has to do is turn on the nightly news and BAM! there's another Toyota story.

The most recent story to hit the news was from this past Monday when James Sikes, 61, reported to have been driving his 2008 Toyota Prius down a Interstate 8 near San Diego, California when he went to pass a car. He claims his vehicle magically accelerated up to 90mph and he could not stop it. He managed to call out the California Highway Patrol, you know those handsome looking chaps that ride motorcycles and concentrate on hitting on chicks instead of busting drug dealers?

There is some credibility to his story because it's backed up by the officers that arrived to see his speeding green machine cruising down the highway. However, I'm not so certain that Toyota's sticky accelerator is to be blamed on this one, especially after hearing the sound-bytes from his interview. The officer, Todd Neibert, that arrived on the scene shouted instructions to Sikes on how to stop the car and said Sikes was jumping on the brakes.

Here is something to consider though: Say Sikes was cruising down the freeway at 65mph, an average highway speed, but while he was busy doing everything but driving (talking on his mobile, fixing his hair, whatever) he didn't notice he was riding the brakes on his car. It's easy enough to do, especially if you have large feet and aren't paying attention. One might not even notice they are doing it. So the brake began to heat up, and I know Prius have some wonky regenerative braking system that make the brake do something strange. Combine that with presumably improperly maintained brakes and the awful OEM pads and of course your cars isn't going to stop very well...if at all.

Now say Sikes was driving with the cruise control on, which most of us do (OK I don't because I ordered a car without it for whatever reason). He went to pass someone and thought he was Michael Schumacher or something and got slightly rev happy. I mean I know it's a Prius and everything but occasionally everyone has a lead foot. Obviously when you hit the accelerator with cruise the car accelerates and then holds that speed until the brakes are applied. This could easily be seen as unintended acceleration.

Let's combine that with Sikes oversized feet and shot brakes. Trying to stop a car from this acceleration would be mighty difficult if not impossible. A run away Toyota isn't as far fetched as it might have seemed.

Now one might wonder why I assume the Sikes would be oblivious to this sort of stuff. Well one quote sort of did me in: "Neibert told Sikes after the CHP caught up with him to shift to neutral but the driver shook his head no. Sikes told reporters he didn't go into neutral because he worried the car would flip."

Seriously? What sort of person thinks that a car will suddenly flip over if you shift into neutral. This is clearly a person that shouldn't be out driving a car because he doesn't know how to handle it during an emergency. I can't even comprehend the physics behind how a car might flip over if shifted into neutral, mainly because I shift my car into neutral all the time while in motion.

Don't get me wrong, this could have been an instance of unintended acceleration caused by a sticky accelerator. But the way the media latched on to it, it's the only explanation. And considering this was a guy who thought his vehicle would flip over I don't really can't see him as the sort of bloke who's really on the ball with driving. Also who thinks 90mph is "terrifyingly fast"? Maybe it's because I live in Michigan and people do 70 in a snow storm while bumper to bumper on I-696, I don't know. But 90mph on a motorway just doesn't seem like it would scare the bejesus out me.

I'm not here to defend Toyota. I'm not a hardcore fan of their products and I think they are all fairly dull, but I'm also not one of these anti-Toyota people who think they are some how the devil that's killed the American auto industry. What I am against is the fact the media takes whatever story, grandstands it, and then ruins major companies which employ thousands of Americans.